It’s hard as parents, not to fear what we don’t understand. Imagine a constant state in which you are measured by what you could would and should be doing better!!!? Gasp! Well it’s a tiring way to live and sadly, reflects the inner emotional state of so many of us from adolescence through adulthood. When you tell someone what they should be doing, when your eyes are on how they fall short and what they need to fix to meet your measure of their success, or the World’s measure of their success or society’s measure of your success at parenting, your entire focus is LACK. I feel like the more I take judgment and expectation out of the parenting equation, the more the children become their best selves, and I think there is an obvious but also secret reason for this. So you know, how often do we get that? Happy Thanksgiving to me. And she did it with LOVE and kindness and the most genuine caring and compassion a soul could hold. She has spent three months care-giving for her sister, so that I could care give for my mother, and her entire little emotional being was focused on ensuring that I would be spared the extra hard challenging part of that care-giving upon returning home.
I arrived, bleary eyed and sleep deprived from a very intense health care boot camp to one very ecstatic doggo who communicated to me through maniacal tail wags that she was so incredibly relieved that I, Persephone, had merely been trapped in the Underworld by Hades for a stint and had not in fact rejected her as an unworthy pack member.Īnd then there was my little red-headed Riding Hood, throwing her empty arms around me in tears of happy relief, red faced from cleaning the house, not to conceal the wild sorority parties she had been throwing in my absence (think tea, knitting and Animal Crossing), but as an effort to spare me from, well, so many other things. Well, I am back in the great province of Alberta, to the house I have called home for nearly two decades, after sleeping on a sofa for coming up on three months.
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